Hmmm what the fuck feeling...

Oof...
I dunno what to say bruhh...
I never felt intense jealousy before...
I mean what the fuck?
I can't really... 
I kinda hate myself...
Why am I get jealous so quickly?
And it is an easy thing that people know how to do it but why not me?
I hate it so much really...
I want to run away at that moment just like a pussy...

Busy in life is such a bitch, fuck it really...
I am always gone when people I love needed someone the most, it is just fucked up... 
Well I am just not good enough I guess...
I tried to change myself to be more lovely person but I just dunno how to comfort people...
That is not my forte...
I thought I know how to do it but when the time comes, I never cease to fail it...
I will always stay close but remain quiet, because I dunno what to say or what to do when people are being sad or having troubles...
I can only ask what's wrong and give my best logic explanations or my past experiences on how to deal with that... 
I never know how to comfort or care because I always solve my own problems by myself or just ask one of my friend about it because she and I have the same problems...
Love and comforting?
I am really not good even though I read a lot of articles or internet shit...
It is something that I can't learn can I? 
What the hell is wrong with me anyways...
I am being emotional for nothing, where is my coolness?
Damn heart, you are overpowering my consciousness again...
Maybe I am not ready for this...
I don't deserve to be loved I guess...
Just please stay away from me...
Love someone else but me please...