Longing...

Oh hello guys!
I know, I know, the same good, old and boring opening.
What else can I do huh other than just say hello? :P

Today was unusually free, I am surprised that I got no job to do for the whole 8 hours.
I thought I will be busy than last time because I have taken a lot of days off for more than a week.
However, there is no job on my table.
Somehow I feel anxious and uneasy, everyone was busy except for me.
Oh yeah, there is a new colleague came during my leave and she is Miss R and she is a proofreader too.
That made more sense on why I got no job for awhile...
I guess she is half mixed Chinese and Indian because while I was teaching her on what a QA does and I accidentally heard she spoke in Chinese.
I am impressed, everyone in office is able to speak Chinese although they are not a Chinese.
So what did I do for the entire jobless day?
Technically, I was staring in front of computer for the whole 8 hours and did nothing. 
What for real?! Nahh just kidding...
I checked on my social media and as usual with all the messages were last sent by me so nothing can be done.
So, I was in Quora for the whole morning, time flies until I didn't even realized it was lunch time...
Quora is bad news, bad for me!
I quit that last time also because it will make my mind spin very fast and I will become more crazy lastly it stressed me out because there are too much questions going on in my mind.
Sometime I feel even more depress as I know nuts!
For instant, I don't even know who is the first person to step on the moon.
(In case you also dunno who is it, it is Neil Armstrong)  
When there is first person, there must be second too!
Same I don't even know who that second fellow is, well it is Buzz Aldrin.
After so many years, only today I know who are them.
Disgrace D:
Furthermore, do you even know that there is third person in the same unit but sadly he didn't land on moon so not much of people know about him, he is Michael Collins.
Moreover, actually they were not the first unit(Apollo 11) to the moon, there were others unit which went to moon but didn't step foot on it and went back to Earth.
Oh boy, pardon me for writing out of control!
There are also other stuffs that I am trying so hard to understand even though few hours of researching still I can't comprehend.
For example, Linux operating system, bitcoins, C language, C++ language and I also dunno about Hitler stuff...
I am suck at all these facts, the world is changing at a very fast pace, I feel like I am still standing on the same spot and make zero progress...

Oh yeah, I also got my result from the BMAT course that I have taken earlier of this month and I am not surprise with the result.
It was below average just as I thought.
Feeling sad? No, but I feel disappointed because I am not what people thought I am...
I am not as bright as what many people think of me...
Well, the story doesn't end here right?
Other than disappointing, there is a feeling of longing in me that I wish to get over it as soon as possible...
I feel something is still not right, something is missing here but I am unsure what is it...
Or maybe this is the effects of indulging too much of drama?
Just now, I read back the first manga I ever read entitled <The World God Only Knows>.
It is about a bunch of girls like one guy, fantasy and mystery type of manga, worth to read til the end, the ending is superb and it blow my mind away!
I know, for those who know me, I am crazy on this manga.
It never fail to disappoint me even thought I have read it many time, it always gets me right to the heart.
Not to mention that the MC is super hot and charming, not in appearance but his actions XD.
But that is not the point here, the point is this type of manga always gives hopes and purposes.
-Hopes that you will have a wonderful ending.
-Your existent in this world must have certain purposes that you need to discover yourself.
I dunno if you understand what I mean, well if you don't it is okay since I don't understand myself either.
There are many reasons why I am feeling such:
Maybe because I am not getting the ending that I wanted so badly.
Maybe reading too much of fantasy is not good because sometime it is just a false hope.
Maybe I am into too much of drama -_-
There are too many maybe(s) and maybe none of them is real and I am not real and so you are.
Oh gosh please, I should stop all these nonsense.
This is why you should not read too much and think too much!!!
Well actually this is not even half of my thoughts, there are more and it keeps on going and going in my brain.
I got no choice but to write it down since articles said writing thoughts in somewhere can temporary put them in safe place so that your mind don't have to be forced to remember everything... 

Oh yeah, last Thursday is indeed fun, went out with a fellow, two people in a world -direct translate-
Funny part is which it took us whole day and night to decide where to go because both of us are super indecisive haha!
After that day is a disaster, I got terrible headache and it feels like my brain is going to explode soon.
I might write about last week in another post!
For that one fellow who is going to face examination soon, wish you good luck!!!
For the one that taking result soon, may force be with us!!!
It is late now so I should ciao, have a great night!